Wednesday, August 3, 2022

Fashion is a form of ugly...

 

"Fashion is a form of ugly so hideous that it must be changed every six months"

Subtitle: How to dress like an old man

ERJ advice on fashion (clothing)

Only buy clothing that fits your body.

Buy clothing that allows your body to move through a wide range of motions. Can you bend over and pick up a penny in your new duds? Can you throw a baseball? Can you climb a ladder?

Select fabrics that are durable. That eliminates many pre-ripped jeans and stretchy fabrics like the "denim" used in women's jeans.

Select designs that can be adjusted to provide protection from a wide range of environmental challenges: Sun, cold, wind, insects for example. Layers and the means to close seams/sleeves are your friends. Designs that are baggy enough to roll up sleeve or add layers beneath are also your friend.

Choose fabrics that complement the environmental challenge criterion.

Pockets. Lots of deep, functional pockets. Carrying a pack or a suitcase can make you a target in some places. Pockets, not so much.

Choose pants and shorts with zippers that are durable and long enough that you can do your business without having to loosen your belt. This is a big deal if you are "carrying".

Chose fabrics that are easy to care for. Why would you buy shirts that require ironing, for instance or require special laundry conditions? (Wool sweaters and down parkas might be an exception to this advice). If you are in an environment where you will get wet or sweaty, then synthetics dry more quickly than cotton.

Choose colors that mix-and-match multiple tops or bottoms.

Avoid colors and fabrics that show stains.

Quantity has a quality all its own. Five pairs of slightly worn and slightly faded black jeans are superior to one, $200 pair of tacti-cool slacks.

Bonus humor (and worth every penny you paid for it)

My Physical Therapist suggested that I might benefit by downloading some special software.

His description was pretty graphic.

9 comments:

  1. And for those of us in the northern parts look for WigWam Merino Wool Socks . I wish I would have discovered them years ago . Menards puts them on sale now and then . Last few pairs I got for $8 . Wear like iron and are super warm when that temp gets down there . As much as I hate Menards [ they had three guys chase me for not masking ] I still go there to check the socks out . And did you hear about Paul Menard dumping toxic wood preservatives in the creek behind his home ? 1st degree creepster !

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  2. I found uniform shirts from Red Kap wear pretty well. I buy greys and blues normally. They are blendable around here with the landscape. I really do need to get some dye. I've been planning to make some black jeans out of the worn ones I have. I wish I could find some old tropical weight cotton clothes, but with the advent of a/c, they aren't very cheap or available.

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    1. I think it's important to blend in while not wearing "tactical" or military looking clothes or gear. That includes avoiding black and OD green when possible.

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  3. If you are under 30 and can't piss off those over 30 you are not cool. It is a law of nature as old as people.

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  4. Where I live, young and old wear jeans and a T shirt. Guys and Gals. Work or play. Or camo pants.

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  5. Dickies, among a couple others, make cargo pocket work trousers in a slightly darker navy blue. Not black, OD green or camo, they look pretty close to normal so they don't "stick out", hold up very well and aren't expensive.

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  6. Fashion? Dressing to present the image we think we should have, and/or fit in with the crowd we identify with. We all do it.

    I had a young acquaintance who was taking a law degree. She, and friends, were complaining that the course tutors expected them to dress smartly when attending court as part of the learning experience. They were all up in arms about “having to wear a uniform”, until I pointed out that they (identically attired in black, with piercings and tatts) already were – something they weren't best pleased with me for pointing out (tough), or for informing them it was merely ‘showing respect’ for the institution and people involved (not to mention a degree of professionalism).

    I’ve always worn green or black (uniform or personal) and my choice of clothes (Arktis, Sarma, Sasta, Keela and Buffalo – it used to include Fjallraven until it became expensive fashionable crap) and, whilst generally seen as “scruffy” would (if there were any) have ‘my crowd’ gushing like school-girls about how cool (is that still a the word, I feel old) I look.

    Just don’t start me on about boots – I once made the mistake of criti … I mean mentioning a lady’s shoe collection … until she pointed out I have as many boots (No, they’re not to match my rucksacks … er, even if they do, but the best for whichever environment, season, job I’m doing and … because I can. And because they last, I have decades worth – I even have two pairs of Mickey Mouse boots to supplement my Nokian Naalis, and you don’t want to know what it took to find size 13 UK (14 US) them, and I'm not going to talk about/admit it!).

    Admit it, you aren’t just wearing hard-wearing, practical clothing because they are, but because they reflect what you feel is important, and let you fit in/identify with your kind of people too.

    So I welcome the freak-shows as simply making it obvious which weirdo's need to be ignored, avoided (and/or shot on sight as necessary) from a distance.

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