Lingerie bags

The longer I am married, the clearer it becomes that I hit a Grand-slam home-run in my wife.

I asked her what she wanted for a special gift. After a bit of thought, she informed me that the key to her heart was a bag to put clothes-pins in, one that she could slide along the line as she hung up laundry.

Well, I searched high-and-low to no avail. The bags I clearly remember from my youth are now extinct.

Being the resourceful fellow that I am, I bought a small, mesh bag and a small carabiner to clip it to the line. The closest I could find to what I was looking for was labeled "Lingerie bag". Perfect!

Not so perfect
Assembling the pieces-part, it became clear that the lingerie bag was not small.

In fact, it could swallow a five gallon bucket and have room for another three quart jars of pickles.

It boggles the mind.

Back in the early days of the internet
Back in the early days of the internet, one of the first videos that was making the rounds was of a German fellow who woke up in a very feminine bedroom.

He groaned like maybe he had a few beers the night before.

Then, as he moved, he discovered he was handcuffed to the head of the bed.

A big smile spread across his face. You start to notice the sound of a woman showering and singing, joyfully.

Conversation in German.

Then the camera pans back. We see the ceiling fan. A frilly, lacy, bright red tent is on one of the fan blades as it slowly rotates above the man.

The man looks upward.

The timing is superb. About the time you recognize what the tent really is, so does the man.

The man starts heroically thrashing about, trying to yank the slats out of the headboard.

The woman trills. We suspect that she is seconds away from renewing her relationship with Adonis.

Fade-out.

I suspect this lingerie bag was designed for her dainties. Not that I have anything against Plus-sized women.

Or maybe most women only wash their dainties once a month. Or two.