Q: Why did the armadillo cross the road?
A: To show the possum it could be done.
Q: Why did the armadillo cross the road?
A: To get to the Shell Station.
Q: Why did the armadillo cross the road?
A: He was auditioning as the drummer in a Heavy Metal band (Thump-Thump)
A fat man showed up at the Pearly Gates and St Pete was taking his personal info.
St Pete: Where are you from?
Fat man: "Yup Nort. Oim from Joisey" (I am from New Jersey).
St Pete: Can you tell me an interesting story from your life so folks can remember you better?
Fat man: "Yeah, I'z pullin' a U-Haul in Florida when I hadda take a leak. Soes I parks da rig 'side da road and stepped inta da weeds an I starts to whiz."
St Pete: "Sounds interesting. Keep going" as he scribbles the story on a divine tablet.
Fat Man: "Soes I feels dis tappin on my shoulder and I turns ta see whad it is, 'n its a Florida State Trooper"
St Pete: "Yes, keep going"
Fat Man: "An I peed all up and down da leg-a his pants and all over both dem shiny boots"
St Pete: "That's one of the best stories we have had in a long time. And when did you say that happened?"
Fat man, looking at his watch: " 'bout tree minutes ago."
LOL, good one!
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