Monday, July 25, 2022

Mission Creep

I am not happy. Nope. I am not.

Love isn't a feeling. Love is the conscious choice to do something "loving" especially when you don't want to do it.

The tricky thing is that we are often skating on thin-ice with regard to whether we are actually "enabling" our kids in an unhealthy way.


Kubota accepted a job in Grand Rapids. The job involved working off-site. Lodging and a per-diem stipend were included when off-site.

Kubota's personal transportation puked. We agreed to drive him to G.R. on Monday morning and pick him up Friday afternoon. Total weekly mileage of about 300 miles. We did this for the last two weeks.

Kubota's boss secured a job in the Grand Rapids area for this week. No per-diem. No lodging. Kubota either needs a place to sleep in Grand Rapids or he needs daily transportation there. The median rent in the Grand Rapids area is $1600/month.

Kubota now realizes that the Grand Rapids job is not sustainable. It is easier to get a job when you have a job. It is like getting a girl-friend. It is easier to "trade-up" when you already have a girl-friend. He has a friend who has a friend who knows of an opening...

Mrs ERJ is temporarily out of the driving rotation for minor medical reasons. Two round-trips to Grand Rapids puts 300 additional miles on my truck a day and about five hours of driving. I can do it for a week...maybe.

No, loaning Kubota a vehicle is not on the table. No, Kubota is not paying us...he has to get his own set of wheels running.

Sucks to be me. I did it to myself.


  1. Yea.... the things we will do for our kids. Even when we don't want to.

  2. Kubota needs to get another job. His boss is who triggered this problem and now you are getting put in a spot for it. And Kubota needs to grow up and he never will if he keeps getting bailed out by you and Mrs. ERJ. --ken

    1. I am not arguing with you.

      His life will improve vastly (and so will mine) if he learns to secure the next job before quitting the current on. The air-bubbles in his cash-flow are killing him.

      He has a week and maybe next-Monday if it is an off-site week.

      The boss does screw them because he announces where they will be on the weekend before the work week. He goes through a lot of workers. Not knowing if you will be in-town makes it hard for significant-others to make plans.

  3. My oldest daughter spoiled her youngest boy rotten . When they were living here the friction was daily from the boy stealing from us . They eventually moved out to keep the peace . I guess the daughter came home last week and the boy had removed her bathroom door and installed it on a neighbors house for some beer money . I was greatly amused . You keep bending over and they will be glad to use you . I'm old , tired , and get off my lawn !

  4. Is your son the only person working that temporary location ? If there is another, could maybe the pair of them book a low cost nearby hotel room and share the costs ?

    I agree with coyoteken48 above - his boss is putting your son in this position. A real jerk to do this to his workers.

  5. Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, or Coast Guard

  6. My oldest is 19. Failed 2 semesters at community college, struggling to get him into local technical school due to lack of motivation on his part.
    I see the early childhood battles I passed on coming home to roost.... Adulting ain't easy.

  7. His boss can't be only one working contract work. He needs to start networking for other sites doing same. When I worked contract with lodging and per diem if we didn't know by Wednesday late afternoon we were looking for new jobs. Doing this I was rarely out if work for 20 years.


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