Monday, March 13, 2017

1990s buzz-words: Where are they now?


Benchmarking - The practice of using a Sharpie to mark where you sit every morning as you peruse the paper for jobs.

Best practices - A Cargo cult that attempts to achieve superior results by aping the processes of their betters.

Beyond loyalty - The thumb-drive that means that you will never go down alone.

BPR - Blue Pabst Ribbon...gimme a nudder

Contingency workforce - See outsourcing

Core products - iWhatever

Teams - Like a committee but filled with minions who can be blamed for bad outcomes.

Intrapreneuring - A way of promoting growth by lavishly spreading "fertilizer" within the organization. Just wash your hands afterward

Virtual corporation - producing virtual profit for everybody but the broker offering the IPO. He gets real profits.

Outsourcing - The practice of handing all of your markets and technical prowess to low cost producers in other countries. Fifteen years later they will buy your remaining trademarks.

Cutting edge - Bleeding edge

Theory Z - Dare we say....Zombies?

Synergy - An excuse to enter a market that will justify previous mal-investment, thereby providing incentive to double-down on that mal-investment. Example: A steel company getting into coal gasification as a way to amortize coke ovens.

Paradigm - Twenty cents

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