Monday, August 27, 2018

When young men start doing laundry

Kubota has always done laundry.  It was part of his chores.  He was on the hook to do one load a week.

Mrs ERJ did the other six loads of laundry he generated a week.  I used to but I was fired because I did not exercise enough care.

My method was to gather up all of the clothing and assorted detritus in the general vicinity of his laundry hamper, regardless of color, fabric or origin.  I threw an appropriate amount into the laundry masticator set to cold.  Added a dollop of soap and pushed "Go". 

Drying was equally simple.  Throw the wad of fiber and peanut butter sandwiches into the drier, set to low heat and launch.

Kubota had trained Mrs ERJ that it was imperative that she use a minimum of four different laundry products.  That included, but was not limited to spot stain removers, laundry detergent, laundry softener, laundry color-fast sheets and drier anti-static sheets and drier anti-stinkum sheets.

When Mrs ERJ did his laundry it came out as soft as a mother's caress and smelled like an angel's smile.

Kubota tends to procrastinate.

He ran out of clean towels.  It took him three months of doing his own laundry but it happened.  I guess he was only able to squeeze half a month out of each of his six towels.

I heard him rummaging around by the shoe bench.  That is where Mrs ERJ stores the "dog towels."

The towels smell like ALL things Canis fidelis.

If the dogs have an accident in the house, we use the dog towels.

If the dogs come in wet from a romp in the frog pond, we use the dog towels.

If the dogs roll in greasy, dog perfume, we use the dog towels.

If one of the dogs is ill and we wish to give it a bit more comfort, we let it sleep on one of the dog towels.

The dog towels get their own trip through the laundry cycle because eau de canine would permeate everything else washed with them.

I looked up and saw Kubota sniffing one of the plusher specimens.  It had a hole the size of a softball in the middle of it.

Wordlessly, he flipped it over his shoulder and strode off to take his shower.


  1. Sigh... He'll learn... Hopefully!

  2. I learned to do laundry in 9th grade, when I played football. My mom told me she wasn't going to wash all my smelly football stuff, and I had to do it.

    So I did. That was 1976. It was good for my character :)

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