An old story

The newly-wed couple was riding in the back of a cab to the motel after the small ceremony at the Justice of the Peace.

The bride was unusually quiet. Finally she said "You will have to go slow and be gentle. This will be my first time."

"How can that be?" the groom asked. "You were married three times before."

"The first time I was married" the woman explained "it was to my high-school sweetheart. Timmy was SOOO sweet and wanted everything to be perfect. There was no champagne in the hotel room so he ran across the street to buy a bottle of Boone's Farm. He was hit by a truck on the way back."

"I wasn't going to make that mistake again" the woman vowed. "The next man I married was old. I wanted to make sure he was excited enough to consummate our marriage, so I danced and teased him. He had a heart attack and fell over dead."

"OK" said the man. "That explains two of them."

"What about the third?" he asked, recalling that her third husband had been a prominent politician and was still alive.

"Turned out Eddie was a Communist. He sat on the end of the bed all night long telling me how great everything was going to be. When I woke up the next morning, my purse was missing and he had run up $1.2 million dollars of debt in my name."