Feeling a little pithy today

To whomever it may concern: Our German Shepherd now identifies as a vegan, Rainbow Tortoise with a very small carbon foot-print.

We switched to Celsius in the winter and keep our home at a frosty 20 degrees. We programmed the AC to kick on at 533 degrees Rankine.

Wiccans are always welcome on our front porch. You cannot beat wiccan furniture for comfort on a hot, summer day.

The spark-plug on my lawn-mower runs on electricity. Guess that makes it an electric mower.

We drive in reverse when returning from trips to put fuel back into the tank.

We are down to eating only two eggs a week: Seven weeks old, plucked, eviscerated and roasted with rosemary.

We plant only indigenous species. I try to avoid megafauna because they require big holes.

Knowing that we eat better than most people in the world, Progressives are frequently invited to devorar my fecal output.

I take great comfort in the verses Mark 5:1-13. 

Then they came to the other side of the sea, to the country of the Gadarenes.  And when He had come out of the boat, immediately there met Him out of the tombs a man with an unclean spirit,  who had his dwelling among the tombs; and no one could bind him, not even with chains,  because he had often been bound with shackles and chains. And the chains had been pulled apart by him, and the shackles broken in pieces; neither could anyone tame him.  And always, night and day, he was in the mountains and in the tombs, crying out and cutting himself with stones.

When he saw Jesus from afar, he ran and worshiped Him.  And he cried cout with a loud voice and said, “What have I to do with You, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? I implore You by God that You do not torment me.”

For He said to him, “Come out of the man, unclean spirit!^" Then He asked him, “What is your name?”

And he answered, saying, “My name is Legion; for we are many.”  Also he begged Him earnestly that He would not send them out of the country.

Now a large herd of swine was feeding there near the mountains.  So all the demons begged Him, saying, “Send us to the swine, that we may enter them.”  And at once Jesus gave them permission. Then the unclean spirits went out and entered the swine (there were about two thousand); and the herd ran violently down the steep place into the sea, and drowned in the sea.

Change "name" to "pronouns" and "...cutting himself with stones" to "...gender affirming procedures" and "cannot be bound by chains and shackles" to "revolving door, Woke justice system" and you can see it is happening again today.

Anybody know where I can purchase a large herd of swine?