Fake News Friday: Job interviews

St Peter was walking up and down the line of recruits and he was feeling pessimistic.

Every fifty years or so Satan would start feeling frisky and the Archangel Michael and his host would give him a bitch-slapping.

The unpleasantness of the 1940s had left both sides pretty banged up but Mike was not recovering as fast as Satan and the new meat was, well, flawed.

It was time to start interviewing.

St Peter looked the first Super Hero in the eye and asked, "What is your super power?"

"I get mad and turn green. Then  I break things." the first candidate said.

"Break things, sir." St Pete corrected.

"Whatever." replied the slouching man.

The next candidate needed a haircut.  "What is your super power?" St Pete asked.

"I have a really big hammer." the man replied and then belatedly added "Sir." The female angels swooned.

This was not going anywhere fast.

The third guy was a rich frat boy with a cool car...and so it went down the line.

The last guy in line was a rugged individual who obviously paid great attention to his appearance and his clothing.  St Pete, in his despair, almost did not interview him...the last thing he wanted was to interact with another fop.

"What is your super power?" St Pete asked.

"I make people work together. I make weak men strong and then I make strong men invincible. I improve the memory of morons so they remember how to care for their weapons until the day they die, SIR!" the man replied.

St Pete had found what he was looking for.  "I don't recognize you from the comic books or Marvel Movies.  Tell me, what is your name."

"Drill Instructor Ermey, SIR!"