Saturday, October 26, 2019

The Karpman Drama Triangle

Drama. Who needs it?

Apparently, more people than we realize.

The Karpman Drama Triangle is a model of how some humans interact. There are three basic scripts.

Victim: This actor is the pivot man. In my experience the Victim will often push scripts onto the other two, sometimes unwilling, actors.

Persecutor: Can't have a victim without a villain. All of that PC stuff is useful for creating villains out of innocent dupes just minding their own business.

The last thing somebody addicted to drama wants is for people to mind their own business.

Rescuer: There is no profit in being a victim if there is not a rescuer to stripmine resources from. It is often difficult to see what benefit the Rescuer accrues from Drama. It is usually a sense of power or agency that may be missing in 'real life'.

Other scripts
How many counsellors does it take to change a light bulb? One, but it has to want to change.

Other scripts only work when the actors want to change.

Victim can be reworked into "vulnerable, developing problem solving skills"

Persecutor can be reworked into "assertive but not punishing"

Rescuer can be reworked into "caring but not over-reaching and growth stifling"

Another parallel mapping that is sometimes proposed is

Victim can become "a creator who is outcome oriented and takes responsibility for their actions and decisions. Key question, 'Was I effective?'

Persecutor can become "a challenger who clarifies the creator's assumptions and goals and helps them stay focused."

Rescuer can become "a coach who asks the creator questions as a way to create a trail of bread-crumbs that lead to the creator solving their own problems."

Social Media
Social Media's primary function seems to be to create drama.

Drama creates victims, persecutors and rescuers.

You just have to shake your head when you hear that a simple reminder to pick up your dog's poop generates 327 comments on a neighborhood Facebook group and results in five families feuding.

4 comments:

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  2. Some people seem to live for the Drama. There are entire groups of people who are Always victims. A few enjoy the attention and some are even rewarded with money or gifts or govt benefits to " help them" in their victim status. Others are rescuers or persecutors….with a few who seem to be in more than 1 group at the same time. A rescuer could potentially be a victim who is fighting back. Still, the rescuer can be just as addicted to the Drama...it may give them power or fame . ( Thinking of some community activists). In turn they may cause even more Drama as they persecute whomever they think is the cause of the original drama.
    As to the Dog poop analogy...been there...seen that. Both IRL and figuratively. Recently I noted a person on a Cruise Ship page. People asking questions etc. Someone wanted to know if there was anywhere on board the ship they could smoke. Of course...DRAMA....How dare you smoke ? ?? Don't you know its killing you !!! Finally someone pointed out....hey...they weren't trying to get YOU to smoke OR trying to smoke in Your space ! Just asking where is the 10x10 approved space on a multiple K Sq ft ship where they could smoke without being shot or jailed. Sigh. I have seen similar drama on countless Social Media pages if anyone dares to say anything even slightly different than the pages main theme. If you are on a diet page and say....hey...diet is great but.... I ate a 3000 calorie meal and didn't die. Will get back on the wagon but... man...they will shout down a disbeliever or backslider.

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  3. The one good thing about returning to a die-off, wearing rat pelt shorts and fighting each other with sharpened pieces of concrete rebar. The end of drama.

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  4. This is why I dropped Facebook for almost a year. I wound up getting dragged back, because several ham radio entities do everything on that platform. Yay.

    I spent several evenings removing every picture I'd ever posted and every post. Then I dropped every group not related to radio. Then I dropped all friends except for blood kin, kin by marriage and a few very close personal friends.

    Any drama from any of those and they get silenced for 30 days. Repeat offenders are removed.

    It's amazing. I can read everything I want to see in 5 minutes a day or less. No stress, no bother. I'm trying to figure out how to apply this in the meat world.

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