Prepper reveals arsenal of weapons-of-mass-destruction to the press (Satire)

An unidentified Michigan prepper revealed his arsenal of heinous weapons-of-mass destruction to Jimmy Olsen, intrepid reporter for The Daily Vapors.

The prepper proudly displayed stacks of metal objects that can be converted to the dread assault-stick.

The prepper explained how edges can be ground into the metal object (blue region) by rubbing the object against concrete. Then, the object can be mounted on a long stick and reused an infinite number of times against peaceful protestors!

The Daily Vapors performed careful calculations and determined that thirty of these weapons-of-mass destruction could inflict 144,000 lethal wounds in only eight hours!!!

But that's not all!!!

Cups are clearly visible that can be used for measuring explosives and so are "Bulldog" clips that can be used to create electrical switches for trip-wires to detonate explosives. 

---Satire---