Thursday, April 3, 2014

Lipstick or Sparkplugs

Well, it is official.  Kubota's girlfriend dumped him.

He is taking it far better than expected.  Frankly, he seems relieved.

Having a lady friend is a heavy, heavy burden and an awesome responsibility when one is an eight grade boy.

The job description is strewn with nearly insurmountable obstacles.  How do you take your lady out on a date?  Do you pick her up riding the bus?  Do you show up driving your parent's lawnmower? Or, gack! do you ask your parents for a ride?


My experience is that I learned one important thing with each serious relationship I had.  Much of dating is learning about one's self.  What is negotiable.  More important, we learn what is not negotiable.

After we have learned all of the important things then we are "ready". 

My mental image is that a person who is "ready" is like the one, perfectly ripe banana at the grocery store.  They may have 300 green bananas on the display and one perfectly ripe one.  The ripe banana will be picked off by a hungry customer within minutes.

So it is when you are "ready".  BAM!  Within days or weeks you will find your self in a great, long lasting relationship with another ripe banana.

Sidebar:   I once dated a woman who claimed to have four personalities: Peggy, Agnes, Juanita and Lucy.  

  • Peggy was her default personality.  Peggy was as comfortable as an old, beloved pair of shoes.
  • Agnes was Grande Dame mode.  Formal dress, make-up, different vocabulary.  Intimidating.
  • Juanita was the domestic help.  Doo-rag, Spanish cussing, manic cleaning mode.  Fishing was always good when Juanita showed up.
  • Lucy was the vamp.  "Lose" ==> Lucy.  Get it.  I can honestly say that I did not stick around long enough to meet Lucy.

So, the rhetorical question is, do people learn multiple important things when they date people with multiple personalities?  End Sidebar.

Back to Kubota

Kubota seems more relieved than anything.  He wants to play the field.  He wants to save his money and invest in sparkplugs.  He has his eye on a dirt bike.  As the old saying almost goes, "If it wears lipstick or has is going to cost you money."

At this point, I think he will get into less trouble with a dirt bike than he will with a girl friend.  So I am a little bit relieved.  Maybe he will stop bugging me to buy a ride-on lawnmower.

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