Lipstick or spark plugs....gonna cost you money

Kubota found himself with a dilemma.

He has a new girlfriend and a new (for him) go-cart.

There is an old saying, "If it wears lipstick or has spark plugs, it is going to cost you money."  The version I first heard has been slightly translated....but I am sure most of my readers have heard something similar.

Mrs ERJ is not happy about the new (first) girl friend.  She did some research and reported back that this girl, supposedly, has kissed every boy in the 8th grade.  I told Mrs ERJ not to worry because it meant that Kubota was the last boy in 8th grade to get kissed.  She was not amused.

Kubota had traded his Ipod for this go-cart frame.  He has been polishing on it.  Lovin' on it.  Spray painting on it.  He tried to fill the tires with air but they quickly went flat.

Kubota's new wheels, riding in the back of Mr Green Jeans

I offered to take the cart to the grain elevator where I buy most of my tires.  He thought that was a dandy idea.  We threw it in the back of the S-10 and I took him with me to show him how these kinds of things are done.

Owen shook his head sadly.  "Dry rot. New tires run $40 a piece."

Driving back I tried to share some philosophy with Kubota.  "You know, there is an old saying.  If it wears lipstick or has spark plugs....it is going to cost you money."

I glanced across the cab of the truck and saw a face bent with misery.  "Dad, it doesn't even have spark plugs.  Yet."

I sincerely hope that he is luckier at love.

That boy needs a job.

Dinner:

I only mention names when I have the very highest regard for people.

Frank Spica runs a food distribution center on the south side of Charlotte, Michigan.  I called him up and he re-arranged his day to come and pick pears.  We picked four, forty pound boxes that he was going to share with the "competing" food kitchens.  While helping him pick the pears I noticed lots of red, ripe tomatoes.  Some of those tomatoes went into this.

Chili cheese cornbread. 

About 40 minutes later.

Pears, old paper and priorities

This will be a three part post.

Pears

The pears are ripe.  I concentrated on pears that are ripe enough to pick in the last half of September.  Weather has usually cooled down.  The length of the picking window is longer (Robust Process!).  And there are many delicious, productive, easy-to-grow (Robust Process!) varieties.

Yesterday, our former daycare provider came over and picked a couple of 40 pound boxes of Potomac.

Today I picked a 40 pound box of Concorde and a partial box of Shenandoah.

View from the bottom

One advantage to the lazy, no-spray approach is that it is bird friendly.

Box of Concorde with dollar bill as size reference.

Food porn?  Shenandoah cultivar.  I LOVE pears.

Gratuitous shot of heavy harvest

I took the fruit to my Mom and Dad who will share it.  While visiting, my Mom shared some documents that were uncovered while they prepared for their last garage sale (thanks Therese!)

A little family history:

My grandfather's Baptismal Certificate

My Grand Mother's Baptismal Certificate.  I was overjoyed to learn that my maternal Great Grandmother's maiden name was McGunn.  Literally, "Son of a Gunn"  No wonder I like things that go "Bang!"  Also, people from Hubbardston live longer because, in Hubbardston, there are 32 days in July.  Some months may even be longer.

My maternal grandparent's wedding certificate.

Until further notice:

Posts will be sporadic.

One reason I retired at such a young age is that family matters have been....interesting.

My wife and I realized that we needed more "Bench Strength" for when things were.....more interesting.

A family situation became "more interesting" and requires lots of extra, special lovin' from me.  So I will attend to my highest priorities and get back to you as I can.

Psychometrics of noise

It is difficult to map from sound (a form of energy that can be measured) to noise (a form of energy that annoys).

One psychometric study determined that components with rapid rise times are particularly irksome.  The speculation is that those kinds of sounds; rattles, squeaks, snaps, cracks, chugs (and rap) light up our alarm response.

Those ancestors whose muscles tensed up at the unexpected breaking of a twig were more likely to outrun the pouncing Smilodon than those whose muscles remained relaxed.  Guess who contributed more to our gene pool.  So sounds with rapid rise times tend to cause muscle tension....which morph into headaches, adrenaline surges and fatigue.  Sounds with rapid rise times are noise.

Old cars have many rattles.  The old Cavalier has more than its fair share.  Most originated from the rear package shelf.

There are two and a half ways to deal with rapid rise time sounds (which are usually caused by impacts).  One is to separate the parts so they never contact.  Two is to join the parts so they never separate.  Two-point-five is to pack cushioning material between the parts so any impacts are gentle.

Closed cell foam rubber used for door seal strips makes outstanding material to pack between impacting parts.

Sources of rattles can be found by gently thumping parts with one fist while "calming" suspects with the other.  Foam strip can be packed in promising nooks and crannies and the results verified by gently thumping with your fist and not calming the suspect with the other.

Some parts are not ammenable to packing foam between the parts that rattle.  Sometimes they can be calmed down by packing foam to increase pre-load or increase separation by packing foam near the impacting regions.

Butyl rubber and vinyl have good dampening characteristics.

Hooks that hold rear speaker to "package shelf" were rattling because they were loose.  Four inch foam rubber strip packed in region highlighted with green lines lifted speaker and caused hook to not lift off shelf when excited.  Seen from bottom.  Both left and right speakers were packed.

Center High Mounted Stop Lamp (CHMSL) bulb holder (ivory) was not securely locked in holder (translucent red).  Bulb holder secured.

Sunday sermonizing, 9/15

One of the advantages of pre-reading the the Sunday Bible selections is that one can decadently nibble on the hors d'oeuvres at one's leisure.

Today's main reading was the story of the Prodigal Son from Luke.  One snippet, a hors d'oeuvres if you wish, from that reading is: 

"While he was still a long way off, his father caught sight of him, and was filled with compassion....put a ring on his finger..."

It is inevitable that listeners filter out tidbits that don't resonate with our reality.  But I suspect that "ring on his finger" projected very vivid imagery into Jesus's original audience.  So what did "...put a ring on his finger..." mean?

Rings were (and are) instruments of authority.  Rings were used to seal documents and seal contracts.

A husband signing a contract binds his wife to its terms.  A wife signing a contract binds her husband.  They both will benefit or be penalized by the outcome. Because of the ring.

So the prodigal son was not just welcomed back into the family in a nominal or ornamental kind of way.  The prodigal son was given such authority that he could destroy the family if he acted unwisely.  It was deep, absolute, extravagant, foolish forgiveness.  Like giving your wayward, drugging son all your credit cards and access to your password wallet and authority to sign contracts, including taking out loans on your behalf.

As followers of the Word it is our responsibility to discern whether Jesus intended this parable as a metaphor for salvation, or to be a template for our actions and choices, or as hyperbole to shock us into viewing creation in a new way.

I hope you enjoyed the hor d'oeuvres.

Neighbor dogs, continued

Mrs ERJ reported back.  She scored it a partial success.  The neighbor admitted his dogs were getting to be a handful, and that this was the third time this month that somebody had complained.

He advised us to carry dog biscuits and to pitch a handful up onto the lawn every time we passed.  He also advised that we hold our arms straight down by our sides and to not move them.  He advised that we not turn our backs on them and that we not speed up or slow down our rate of travel.  He advised that this is common knowledge on how to deal with aggressive dogs.

He knows he has aggressive dogs.

Mrs ERJ asked why the dogs were out.

The neighbor replied that they had rolled in something and smelled bad.

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At this point in the story a twinge of guilt started seeping into the back of my head.

A different neighbor and I had been discussing this very problem about 10 days ago.  The four Labs had entered his yard, chased down his dog and chewed it up.  So I shared with him one of those gems of wisdom that I had gleaned off the internet.

"The key to managing a neighbor's problem dogs is to change it from your problem to his problem."

A thread on 24hourcampfire about three years ago chewed on the problem of a Rottweiler that took huge steamy dumps in a 24hourcampfire guy's yard.  The guy had a 18 month old daughter who toddled about the yard and he had visions of her swan diving into a Cleveland Steamer.  Discussions with the neighbor had not resulted in the neighbor controlling his dog.

If I remember right, EH76 advised that a pile of greasy roadkill becomes irresistible doggy perfume in about a week.  The dog will roll in it and then, ever desiring to improve their master's life, will transfer that perfume into the living room shag carpet.  EH76 advised that raccoons are most desirable due to the greasy/stringy nature of their decomposition but that any pile of miscellaneous roadkill or carp carcasses can be made to serve if one adds about a gallon of cheap salad oil to the top of the pile.

"The key to managing a neighbor's problem dog is to change it from your problem to his problem."

In short order, the neighbor will figure out how to keep his dog out of your yard.

I thought nothing more of the conversation.

Until today.

Welcome to my soap opera

Oldest daughter took another step toward full adulthood.  She called me up and told me that she had her own cell phone and plan and I could take her off ours.

I had some twinges of regret.  I did save very much money.  But Mrs ERJ is much wiser than I.  "She wants a new phone.  She can afford it.  It will build her self-esteem."  I almost always listen to Mrs ERJ.

Bella Donna broke down and gave the phone number of one of her guy-buddies to one of the clingy, creepy chicks who has been stalking him.  She just got worn down.  She had a moment of weakness.  Oh, and she is so forgetful...she gave creeper the number of her buddy's dad....the Marine.  Creeper efficiently fired off several inappropriate texts before Marine could respond.  I don't have a crystal ball but my guess is that this will not end well for creeper.

Back on the grass by  the time this picture was snapped.  Two dog on right have serious body language.

Mrs ERJ and I went for a walk around the block.  One of our neighbors dogs had pups and they were not able to find homes for all the dogs.  Consequently they have a mob of four Labs.  MOST of the time they are Johnny-on-it and keep them under control.  Today Mr had been cutting the grass and must have gone inside for something.    The four Labs followed us down the road and kept trying to get around behind us.  Mrs ERJ is up at the neighbors having a chat with them.  Next time I take pepper spray.

Kubota traded his Ipod for a go-cart frame.  He is as happy as a clam.  I am keeping my mouth shut.

Captain gave us a couple of dozen ears of sweet corn.  I am munching one now.  He has a steady clientele of Hmong (Laotian Mountain people) who buy cattle from him.  I took him over a 40 lb box of Asian pears (Yoinashi) to see if it was anything they have a use for.  I used to work with some Hmong.  Darn good people to have on your side when the chips are down.

What do Tim Tebow and a first year teacher have in common?

Question: What do Tim Tebow and a first year teacher have in common?
Answer:  Excellent college performance is only weakly associated with professional performance.

Malcolm Gladwell wrote about the similarities between NFL Quarterbacks and grade school teachers.  The NFL game is so vastly different, and the environment is so much more dynamic that many, even most, great college quarterbacks cannot make the transition.  In a similar way, the teaching classroom is a dynamic, shifting kaleidoscope that is vastly more complicated than the sequential, ordered instruction/examination environment of the college classroom.

It is a bit like swimming.  You can instruct people on the skills of swimming using Powerpoint presentations, videos and breathing drills....but the only way you can find out if they can swim is to throw them into the water.

It is widely recognized that the upper 90% of the teacher population is effective.  They deliver the required materials, monitor the progress, maintain classroom order, comply with the applicable laws and keep adequate records.

The bottom 10% is a disaster.  Not only do they sometimes fail to teach.  Sometimes they teach material that is completely wrong. They complicate the lives of the upper 90%.

I am not banging teachers.  I am not saying that teachers are worse than other professions.  I am saying that education draws from the same population that every other profession draws from and there will be some mismatches.

One reason that teachers are attracted to the profession of teaching is because of the autonomy and the status.  Recent efforts to identify and re-career the bottom 10% have the upper 90% in a dither.  They feel their autonomy and status ("I am a professional, I don't need anybody looking over my shoulder!") is threatened.  The plain reality is that every professional, except Congressmen, is now scrutinized.  Ask your doctor.

Another concern teachers have is "How can it be objective?  How can I be sure that I will not be punished when I am given The-Class-From-Hell?"

The short answer is to consult with mathematicians and with people who use numbers to control other complex processes.

One common strategy to eliminate "noise" like The-Class-From-Hell (TCFH) is use a filter.  A simple one is to look at runs of sub-standard performance.  A "run" is a number of batches in-a-row.

From here

A crude way to filter out the bottom 10% is to take one year's learning growth, rank from top-to-bottom and then re-career the bottom 10%.  Done deal.  Unfortunately, you end up releasing some really competent teachers who were given a batch with very challenging kids.  The teachers I know tell me that the toughest kids routinely get routed to the best teachers.  So those teachers would be double punished.  First with the extra work, then with the additional risk of job loss.

There would also be the temptation to disown those kids.  Those kids are a threat to your livelihood, so there would be a temptation to run those kids down the discipline gang-plank and out of the school. 

A better way to skim the sediment would be to tag every teacher in the bottom 25%, put them on an improvement plan and then release them if they were in the bottom 25% the following year.  The odds of randomly falling into the bottom 25% two years in a row is approximately 6%.  Please be mindful that language like "randomly falling into" implies that teacher ability has no effect on outcomes. 

If teacher ability has a strong effect on learning outcomes, then the chance of an improper "cull" goes way down.

Still too risky?  Pick a number.  Remember that this value is a prediction of the upper bound of improper "cull" picks and it assumes that teacher ability has no effect on outcomes.  1%?  Microsoft Excel informs me that two years in-a-row at sub-10% performance (relative to peers) or three years in-a-row at sub-21% performance will hit that number.  Leaving that system in place for 11 years will find, and re-career that bottom 10%.

And tweaks can be put in place to blank out first-year teachers and to find appropriate peer groups for specialty subjects.  It is not likely that a remedial math teacher wants to lumped into the same pool as the Advanced and Gifted Calculus teacher.  Also, a bigger in-a-row number (accompanied by an appropriate performance threshold) can be selected for upper grades that are on a semester or trimester system because more batches will be processed through in a given school year.

Remember that it is kinder to be re-careered earlier rather than later.  It is kinder to the kids.  It is kinder to the person being re-careered. It is a balancing act to design a system that is both insensitive to noise yet sufficiently responsive to either re-career or re-motivated the bottom 10% in a timely way.

Finally, I think it really does matter.  In our small school district of 3000 kids, a student will likely have seven homeroom teachers and 6 "specials" teachers by the time they hit 6th grade.  Then the number of teachers explodes.  They will likely encounter 15 more teachers by 9th grade and another 20 by graduation.  By my math, that adds up to 48 teachers.  Four or five of those teachers are likely to be in the bottom 10%. 

And the sooner the child encounters a teacher in that bottom 10%, the more damaged they are likely to be for future learning.