Irma

Things are not looking spiffy for southern Florida.

Link-o-rama

Punch-list of things to do before a hurricane courtesy of Alpha Rubicon with a couple of points I thought were particularly germane.

• What to do if you decide to ride out the storm.
  * First, you need to reconsider your decision to ride out the storm.
•  ...have a good portable radio
• Make a videotape recording of your property.
• ...plastic bags are your friends.

 After the Hurricane also courtesy of Alpha Rubicon These are fast reads

• Mold-related respiratory illnesses surface from people still living in their storm-damaged and damp homes 
• Scammers attacking gullible victims charging "inspection fees" 
• Antibiotics in demand as doctors treat a myriad of patients with infections started with a scratched mosquito bite or other itch
• Dogs have banded together to survive on the streets of Charlotte County having reverted to the pack mentality.
• bug spray - (have) enough to several times daily, every day for a month
• Distraught residents talk about suicide, having nothing left to live for
•  "Boil water" order is in effect. Few residents have communications to hear this warning (or have heat source to boil it)

So, you think you have your poop-in-a-group and will be able to help your neighbors?  Also from Alpha Rubicon.

• During Hurricane Hugo I elected to stay in my home, to guard my family's possessions from looters. I was ready and willing to help my neighbors guard their homes, clean up debris after the fact, and in general be an all around model survivalist... then the wind started. 

Nuts can be bad for your health

Running Notes: 4.5 miles yesterday

Rarely seen footage of ERJ jogging through downtown Eaton Rapids

It was a treat for me to have Mrs ERJ accompany me on my run.  She was cheerfully chirping away during the run commenting on kids, convertible sports cars, folks fishing in the river, movies she wants to see, plots of books and movies she enjoyed, our kids....every topic under the sun.

I was gasping for air.  Every cell in my body was screaming for oxygen.  Responses were monosyllabic.

Three-and-a-half miles into the run we were passing the parking lot where the truck was parked.  There was an extra water-bottle in the bed of the truck.  I said, "Would you be a 'peach' and fetch it for me?"  

"You betchya.  No problem." she graciously responded.

I kept slogging away.  I knew she would catch me.  It was just a matter of how long it would take.

The reason I know that is that she obeys traffic signals, stopping at stop lights.  I take a quick look left, then right and kept chugging along.  Restarting takes too much effort.  Besides, if I stopped for too long the concrete in my joints might set.

About two-tenths of a mile later she effortlessly breezed up behind me and said, "Here ya go."

It felt like a race between a rototiller and a greyhound.

The last topic of the run involved panniers for her bicycle.  If any of my readers have experience with various types and brands, I will appreciate guidance.  Especially with regards to features to look for and plusses-and-minuses of various types.  The picture in her head is that she can make a quick trip to the store on her bike to pick up groceries.  

The picture in my head is that she can carry that extra bottle of water on her bike when I am running.

Onions

50 pound bag for $10 and they will keep all winter.  This is a screaming deal if you cook for a large family, run a daycare, cook at a soup kitchen or for firefighters.

Onions HERE

A parting thought for those who might not pay, there are about six miles of irrigation canal that only get dredged once a decade.  Stiffing the onion farmers is not good business.

Any family members who are reading this, send me a text and I will bring your onions to Mom and Dad's next Friday.

Thresholds

The piece in the foreground is the 1.5" step that I tried to fix with the extruded aluminum molding.  Not only did my little brother knock it out of the park but he fixed the other side of the threshold where the step was about an inch.

And he also addressed the threshold between the back porch and the "coat room" of the house.

It looks like he used 5/4" Ponderosa Pine decking which should be good for twenty years.

Thanks for taking this on, little brother.  You did a GREAT job and Dad is happy.

Fake News Friday, Part II

Fake News Friday

Would Bruce Willis be doing a double-take if she was wearing Birkenstocks?

A recent news article recently made me consider whether there was a biological basis for the belief, in certain circles, that women who wear high heels are "HOT!"

I must confess that I have not personally researched this topic in a scientific, double-blind, A-B-A experiment.  This admission is partially motivated by my journalistic honesty and primarily motivated by my desire to stay married.

Womens!
Freddy D. Pendergrass* famously said, "Women's sexuality is 85% mental, 5% physical and 110% Divine Intervention."

Being completely irrational, let's focus on the 5% that is physical.

According to the infallible Wikipedia:

In 1952, Dr. Kegel published a report in which he stated that the women doing this exercise were attaining orgasm more easily, more frequently and more intensely: "it has been found that dysfunction of the pubococcygeus exists in many women complaining of lack of vaginal feeling during coitus and that in these cases sexual appreciation can be increased by restoring function of the pubococcygeus".

The word "volcanic" comes to mind.

The DailyMail.com article cited above claims that US researchers developed a wobbly shoe that produces all of the benefits of high heels without "crunching" toes.

In the fine print, the wobbly shoe exercises the pelvic floor much like Kegel exercises...and by the transitive property of logic, much like high heel shoes.

Thus, one can infer that women who wear high heel shoes  "attain...orgasm more easily, more frequently and more intensely"

One presumes that, based on classical conditioning theory, easier, more frequent and more intense rewards are more likely to reinforce certain behaviors.

Yeah, physical is only 5%...but if wearing high heel shoes makes a girl feel pretty then it tickles the 85% that is mental.  So it is the conclusion of Fake News Friday is that there is conclusive evidence that women who wear high heel shoes are "HOT!"



*To the best of my knowledge, Freddie D. Pendergrass does not exist and never made this statement in public.  That is why this is FAKE news.  Names that are similar to minor celebrities with memorable names are ideal for faux quotes.