A Youtube short of about a minute.
The speaker says his piece and gets booed.
Paraphrasing (because I know some people dislike Youtube)
Men: Do you live a life that demonstrates enough virtue that a rational woman will be comfortable submitting to your authority?
When you are probing unknown territory, do you squash down your ego and ask for guidance? Do you ask HER? That is what mature authority looks like; using the best information to make the best decisions.
Women: Do you demonstrate enough virtue that a rational man will be willing to risk dying to protect you?
This is what "Women, submit to your husbands and men, love your wife the way Christ loved his church"means.
Asking her, if not done carefully (and depending on the woman), generally erodes your authority (and fitness to be her man) in her eyes.
ReplyDelete'Tis a fine line to walk.
Your comment reminds me just how blessed to have the good woman I have.
DeleteShe asks me for help; I ask her for help and neither feel our "authority" eroded.
The Bible calls her a Help Mate. Proverbs 31 doesn't spell out a woman as poor grade as your posting about.
I took care of the household budget. I paid the bills and reconciled the checkbook. My wife would often say that she wanted to do this.
ReplyDeleteI reasoned, her job is in her employer's financial department. She actually likes paperwork. Besides, I had a business to run. So I said okay its all yours.
She despised me for doing so. In her eyes I gave in. Three years later I found she had been embezzling from our household account. I had wondered why are we now short of money? She stonealled and clouded. She hid the checkbook and bank statements. It hadn't ocurred to me to just call the bank. I was busy with work and perhaps too focused on wife who I should be able to trust.
We had agreed to pay for daughter's 4 yr degree plus a couple hundred per month for fun. Wife had upped that amount without my knowledge. $400 became $800+
I had chosen badly. I had been deceived. She had presented herself as a Pr 31 women.
I feel your pain. I ended up shy three house payments when she left.
DeleteBut I've got the real thing now.
I haven't had to die for her yet, but I'm not pushing the issue either.
DeleteSorry to hear that friend.
DeleteShared authority means BOTH are involved in the decisions.
My wife and I do the bills together so embezzlement would be difficult.
Again I am well blessed with a fine woman of many decades.
Communication is a two way street for couples.
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ReplyDeleteI am trying very hard to be the virtuous woman but it has taken me a lot of time to get there. I want to be worthy for that rational man.
DeleteTo their credit, many men and women will stop and think about this. The ones that boo and hiss know the answer and the jeering is cognitive dissonance kicking in. And maybe that’s the answer - if you can look at yourself in the mirror and talk to the old lady… and she can do the same, vice versa… maybe it’s all good and you don’t have to worry…
ReplyDeleteThe author of proverbs 31 is careful to include three facts about this woman. She is married. Her husband has her complete trust. Every decision she makes, is for the benefit of her family. This not only leads to her success but describes the virtue necessary for this outcome. She exercises authority given by her husband because of her inherent goodness. If she were not married, none of this would be possible. She would likely not have the means nor the standing in the community to make these choices. If she were single and living with her maternal family, her authority would be totally controlled by her father, of perhaps an older male sibling. This is because the decision making ability of a women does not factor in actual consequences. She is mostly concerned about her feelings and how her actions, appear to others. Virtue does not enter into the equation. She may think what she is doing is for the best, but without understanding the results of her choices, many paths lead to severe and unexpected outcomes. And not this only, but once authority is given, there is virtually no end to the mischief and problems that result. We can conclude then that authority without virtue will lead to tyranny. As long as women can make decisions without any consequences, the world will continue to suffer greatly. Thus an equitable government for all people will not be possible, discrimination (both overt and legal) will be manifest against all who would refuse to concede to the decisions being made and western civilization will continue to erode.
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